One of the biggest benefits I received when I began studying astrology, was the ability to better understand my loved ones. It’s one thing to understand how you tick, but to have that same knowledge of others greatly improves the quality of your relationships. Moreover, it makes it much easier to navigate the ups and downs of being in a committed partnership.
In this article, I’m going to be sharing with you what points of compatibility you want to examine, and what information you need to relate more with the people in your life. To begin, let’s assume you have a specific person in mind. What you’ll need for greatest accuracy is the person’s birth time. Without it, you will not be able to calculate the rising sign (amongst other things). If you do not have the birth time, however, don't worry, you can still learn a lot about this person through their birthday and birth location. The first placement we want to examine is the Sun.
The Sun The Sun in astrology represents a person’s most authentic self. So, you’ll want to look at the person’s Sun sign because this is a major part of who they are and who they are here to become. If you know the person’s birth time, check out what house the Sun is in because this shows where they’ll feel most comfortable shining their authentic light and standing in their power.
*As you read these points of compatibility below, keep in mind what your own Sun, Moon, and rising signs are, because you will soon learn what signs are naturally going to get along best. If you feel lost with the terminology already, you may want to read this blog before you go further: The Anatomy of Your Chart
The Moon
Next, locate the person’s Moon sign. See what sign and house the Moon is in to get more information on how this person acts when they are feeling emotional – i.e., where they go or what they do to feel most comforted. The Moon is very important in astrology because it represents someone’s emotional “default” behavior. So, if you are in any kind of close relationship, you’ll definitely want to become familiar with the Moon sign! It tells you a lot about how a person is going to act when they are upset, moody, or even perfectly content.
Mars and Venus If you are interested in a romantic partnership, study the person’s Mars and Venus signs. Their Mars sign tells you how they’ll come across sexually and what type of behavior they’ll use to express themselves. The house shows where they'll assert themselves the most and where (in what area of life) they have increased drive, intensity, and passion. Venus shows us how a person loves and wants to be loved. As well as, what they value in a partner and in themselves. Their Venus sign illustrates their aesthetic tastes. Are they well-groomed? Casual? Conservative? Etc. Where Venus is located in the chart shows us where they love to hang out and what types of activities or interests they value most. Life Purpose and Direction:
If you’re curious if you and a potential mate are headed in the same direction, look at the lunar nodes. The north node shows a person’s dharma (life purpose) and the south node shows their karma (gifts already developed and baggage to move away from). Having this information is wonderful for parents who want to give their children direction in life and something productive to focus on. When we understand who a person is becoming, we can offer more grace and understanding as they find their way. To learn more about the lunar nodes, click here.
The Elements
Next, I’d like to briefly cover the elements so you can grasp the core qualities of each sign. The reason this is important is because certain Sun and Moon signs are more compatible than others – based on these elements. There are four elements in astrology: Fire, Earth, Air, and Water. Within each element are the following signs:
Fire signs: Aries, Leo, Sagittarius
Earth signs: Taurus, Virgo, Capricorn
Air signs: Gemini, Libra, Aquarius
Water signs: Cancer, Scorpio, Pisces
Below is a summary of qualities to give you more clarity into the nature of each sign. Use this as you compare someone’s chart to your own.
Fire signs: Passionate, excited, enthusiastic, daring, energized, risk-taking, action-oriented, impatient, impulsive
Earth signs: Down to earth, practical, focused, present, in tune with the five senses and the body’s needs, stubborn, methodical, persistent, task-oriented, dependable
Air signs: Mentally inclined, visionary, independent, solution-seeking, futuristic, inventive, eccentric, humanitarian, aloof, emotionally detached
Water signs: Emotional, sensitive, moody, intuitive, empathic, heart-centered, artistic, creative, imaginative, sentimental, intense
Within all these signs, certain elements are more compatible.
Fire/Air = compatible
Earth/ Water = compatible
*All signs within the same element will also get along (for example: Aquarius and Gemini - both Air). If you would like to learn more about the elements, click here.
The reason Fire/Earth, Fire/Water, Air/Earth, and Air/ Water don’t get along (as easily) is that they have different polarities. Polarities have to do with Yin/Yang energies. Meaning, one is more masculine and one is more feminine. You could also say one is more extroverted and dominant and the other is more introverted and passive.
All Fire and Air signs = Yang
All Earth and Water signs = Yin
By taking the time to learn the elements and polarities of each sign, you’ll have a clearer understanding of why certain signs are simply a better match. To read more about this topic in-depth, check out my blog: Elements, Modes, and Polarities.
Once you’ve become familiarized with the information above, it’s time to compare your chart to your chosen person’s. First, compare your Sun and Moon signs, as these two will tell you a lot about how to relate right off the bat. Then, if you have the birth time, check out their rising sign and we’ll explore exactly what that means below.
I encourage you to become familiar with the nature of the Sun and the Moon signs first because these will help you determine what kinds of dominant behavior are to be expected from your partner, co-worker, child, etc. For example, if your child has an Aquarius Sun but you have a Pisces Sun, you are going to have to realize that your child is not going to be as emotionally in tune as you. They may seem cold and aloof and it’s not because they don’t care, it’s because they are more comfortable in the realm of their mind and their thoughts.
The Mask You Wear
Your rising sign, or ascendant sign, describes your attitude and behavior when you first meet someone. It is the sign rising on the eastern horizon when you were born, and this is why it requires an exact birth time to calculate. The rising sign is the “show” you put on before you’re ready to let people know who you really are. It is used as a defense mechanism to protect your core self from getting hurt. Thus, it plays a very big part in someone’s personality. Every time a person gets threatened, scared, or intimidated, they will resort to their rising sign behavior as a cover-up. It is this “conditioned self” that they feel most comfortable being. It can also tell you a lot about a person’s family environment growing up because it is how they were “trained” to be in society so that they would be accepted.
In Summary
There are many parts in the chart where you can find points of compatibility and planes of connection. The Sun is a great place to start if you’re interested in knowing how to relate to someone or bring out the qualities that will naturally assist them in becoming who they came here to be. The Moon will give you an inside view (literally) of how the person is feeling emotionally. Through that, you can recognize what behaviors may be hurtful and see how best to love them the way they need to be loved. The rising sign helps you see why your partner acts so differently when they’re out at a party versus relaxing one-on-one at home. And finally, the lunar nodes will allow you to understand the skills, traits, and behaviors your loved ones are here to develop on the path to fulfilling their life purpose. I hope this information serves you to better understand and connect with your loved ones!
PS
Please keep in mind, as you learn more about the people in your life, you may find many differences and not as many “planes of connection” as you had hoped for. But fear not, this is why you took the time to learn about them in the first place! Now you know why they act the way they do, and why you don’t always get along. Now it’s up to you to develop tolerance and acceptance for their true nature. If you are not interested in making these changes within yourself, or you want to find someone who is simply more compatible with your dominant nature, it may be time to walk away.
If you are unsure and would like a synastry chart reading to compare you and a partner side by side, I am happy to offer you a $15.00 off coupon with the code SYNASTRY15 that you can use for a reading here.
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